End-of-the-year Reflection: Stop Living on Autopilot

We all know: constraints are good. They are the fuel for our creative thinking. But for life choices and career planning, I see too many people accepting constraints way too easily. They are living on autopilot. Instead of creating their own future, they are more accepting of the future others have in mind for them. So be warned (as Dan Koe writes):

• If you don’t create a career, you will be assigned one.

• If you don’t create a purpose, you will be assigned one.

• If you don’t create a routine, you will be assigned one.

My advice is to avoid adapting to a structure or framework somebody else is putting you in. 

Take a step back and reflect on these things:

• How do I feel right now? As this is a pretty hard question to answer, you can find some inspiration at the end of this post.

• What do I need right now? Are my human needs like belonging, self-actualization, autonomy—or even basic physical needs like sleep, food, and hydration—being met?

• What do I want from life in general, and is my current role/situation getting me closer to this ideal?

• Which constraints make me stick to the current situation/role/behavior/company/ person/? And do I give these constraints the power to hold me there or is it okay to challenge/push these constraints?

If you’re not sure how to express how you’re feeling right now, you might find some inspiration from this image from my book, STRONG Product People. By the way, this is super common—many people struggle to express their emotions and feelings, so having a cheat sheet can really help!

Or, if you prefer a prettier and more colorful version, this chart from Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence organizes feelings and energy in a clear, easy to navigate manner.